One morning about a year after my mother died I called my father, as I did every day, to check in with him and see how he was feeling, what his plans were for the day, and inquire if there were any bills or letters that had arrived in the mail that needed my attention.  As soon as he answered the phone I knew something was wrong.  (more…)

Thinking about my role as caregiver I place it in the context of mother or partner or daughter.  As a mother and partner I care for my family on many levels; the obvious – feeding, supervising, teaching, driving; and the subtle – providing emotional support, listening to problems, encouraging behaviors that will lead to personal growth and happiness, and leading by example. (more…)

My parents were very practical people.  My father was a doctor and my mother had a head for numbers that by default placed her in the role of Chancellor of the Exchequer.  Conversations at out house tended toward the bizarre; my father would discuss medical procedures at the dinner table with the same ease that others spoke of the weather, and my mother could shape even emotional topics like politics and religion into a neatly packaged financial box. (more…)

I was having dinner with some friends the other night and the subject of fear came up. All of us at the table were experiencing some sort of life event: the death of a parent, divorce, re-marriage, selling a home, children leaving for college. We were discussing how fear plays a role in how we approach decision making and how it impacts – for better or worse – the outcome of the situation. (more…)